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Daniil Kharms
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Losses

Andrey Andreyevich Myasov bought a wick at the market and carried it off homewards.
On the way, Andrey Andreyevich lost the wick and went into a shop to buy 150 grams of Poltava sausage. Then Andrey Andreyevich went into the dairy and bought a bottle of curds, then he drank a small mug of kvass at a stall and joined the queue for a newspaper. The queue was a rather long one and Andrey Andreyevich stood for no less than twenty minutes in the queue, and when he reached the newspaper seller the newspaper ran out right in front of his nose.
Andrey Andreyevich was stymied and he went off home, but on the way he lost the curds and dropped into the bakery, where he bought a stick of French bread, but lost the Poltava sausage.
Then Andrey Andreyevich went straight home, but on the way he fell down, lost the French bread and broke his pince-nez.
Andrey Andreyevich reached home in a very bad mood and straight away went to bed, but could not get to sleep for a long time and when he did get to sleep he had a dream: he dreamt that he had lost his toothbrush and that he was cleaning his teeth with some sort of a candlestick.